Frances Horibe's

Defending Against Recognition Stealers In the last post, you found out that you and your collaborator, Wes, had completely different interpretations of whether he had hogged the limelight. You were eventually able to work out things out. But what if you have suspected all along that Wesley, hail-fellow-well-met that he is, is unlikely to be trustworthy in sharing recognition? How do I know if he’s a recognition stealer? It’s not always easy, especially since Wesley has been helpful with your project and added value. But some things you can look for: Does he use ‘I’ a lot? I did it rather than we did it. This can be an indication of his penchant. Is he the first off the mark? That is, he consistently grabs the first word even in just regular get-togethers. Does he go on and on? He never takes a breath so someone else can break in. All of these are annoying but can just be the signs of a vigorous extrovert. The real kicker is: Do you trust him? If you already find yourself picking your words carefully when with him or avoiding sharing ideas, you might have something to worry about. Setting up differently Knowing…

Confronting an Idea Stealer In the last post, you had developed the idea for a game for pre-kindergarten. Wesley, who is senior to you but not your boss, had been very helpful in brainstorming solutions to problems. But when both of you were asked to present the game to the management group, Wesley took all the airtime, making you look like a hanger-on. After the meeting, you are steaming at the dirty trick. You’re gonna get him on it. The letting-off-steam approach You: Why did you do it? Wesley: Hey, Nick, they liked the idea! You: Yeah, with you hogging all the credit. Wesley: What? I was showing the product in the best light. You: And where do you get off giving it a name? Wesley: It just came to me. But good, no? You: That’s not the point. I couldn’t get a word in edgewise. Wesley: What are you talking about? I saved your ass when you clammed up. You: I didn’t—you didn’t let me have any air time. Wesley: Let you? I wasn’t stopping you—I was covering for you. You: And took all the credit. Wesley: Oh, grow up, Nick. I’m not your babysitter—if you want air time,…

My Colleague is Taking Credit for My Work You are looking forward to getting credit for a new, and even innovative, product you’re developed for your employer, a very large children’s toy manufacturer. It fills a niche for pre-kindergarten in your company’s line. The game doesn’t require as much manual dexterity as those for older children but is more challenging mentally then the regular pre-kindergarten stuff. This could be a great selling feature. You’ve put a lot of sweat equity into this and felt that there has been real team work with Wesley, a more senior designer. He is not your supervisor but he’s been a big help, throwing around ideas. You two are ready to present the prototype to your management. The presentation meeting Manager: So Wesley and Nick want to give us an update on the smart pre-kindergarten game. Who’s gonna start? You and Wesley look at each other. Before You can say anything: Wesley: Why don’t I? I’m really happy with the progress on what I’m thinking of calling the Baby Einstein game. This is news to you! Manager: Hey, I like that. Taps into the whole bragging rights for parents. Wesley: Yes, I thought so, too,…

The Extroverted -Introverted Sweet Spot In the previous posts, I’ve discussed how introverts and extroverts can operate successfully in a work environment. But I think that the most successful people find the extroverted -introverted sweet spot. That is, they can call on either set of skills as the situation warrants. So, I’m doing one final example of a meeting. If you tend to extroversion, you should pay most attention to the left-hand column for tips on being effective. The introverts have a similar column on the right. Extroverted Philippa People Dialog Introverted Andrew Prep for meeting: Remember to: · Ask opinions of others · Confirm agreement to solution · Build on suggestions Topic of Meeting: How to coordinate use of 3D printer given recent complaints from both Philippa’s and Andrew’s units Prep for meeting: · Prepare argument · Practice delivery · Identify possible objections You’ve signaled you want to work cooperatively. Philippa: I’ve got an idea of how this might work. Mind if I start things off? Andrew: Sure, but I have a proposal, too. You created a space to come back to your idea. You’re asking for feedback rather than assuming agreement. Philippa: This seems easy to solve. We…

Extroversion Done Right In the previous post, your extroversion blind-sided you when trying to solve a problem with your colleagues. You thought you had a solution but nobody would implement. What went wrong? Well, there were a couple of things: You assumed leadership: Normally, it’s a good thing to have someone in the group who wants to take ownership of the problem and come up with a solution. But because you are all peers, your automatic assumption that you were the leader (implied: the boss) was unwarranted. You didn’t ask others’ opinions: With Ken’s objections (church commitments and babysitting), you handled them on their face value—that is, problems to be solved on the way to your solution. You didn’t consider whether his objections possibly reflected a more general feeling of discomfort with your proposed approach. You didn’t check for level of support for your idea: I think it is evident that at least some in the group didn’t buy your idea because they refused to implement it. If you’d surfaced these objections in the meeting, things might have gone better. Extroversion Done Right Let’s replay the meeting from the last post to get a better outcome. You: So, guys, I’ve…